2/24: Fast 6 mile run

This morning I ran with Tracy and her friend Michelle.  We met at the street corner.  Michelle is super fast!  I was worried I would not be able to keep up.  The push was really what I needed because there were few moments I felt overwhelmed by the pace.  I was able to to carry it.  I ran an extra 1 mile and a half after we got to their street.  I ran a total of 6.47 miles in one hour which isn't bad.  I look forward to running with them again.

I still feel a little congested but not like yesterday.  I don't have any GI issues nor head ache.  I feel like my energy is back.  So wish I could tackle laundry which got behind over the weekend but I have toddlers all day today--doesn't really happen until they are picked up.  I don't feel nearly as anxious as I did yesterday.  One of my kids was dealing with some intense behavioral problems mostly at home last week and I am trying to figure out if it's just a phase or if there is something stressing him/her out.  It's hard to put your finger on what your kids are going through.  I tend to overanalyze everything and that doesn't help

I slept better last night too.  Around 4:30 am I was up every 15-30 minutes until the alarm went off which was a little annoying.  But I slept fine the whole rest of the night.

2/20 - 2/22: 16 miles and life in general

I was so proud of myself that Friday I DID get up early and pounded out 8 miles at the track.  I made it home by 7 am.  My workout went really well actually.  It did make a difference in my morning.  I also took the toddlers on a stroller walk that was a half hour that turned into an hour.  I was on the women's retreat all weekend which was absolutely wonderful.  I am processing how amazing it was.  On the retreat we ate pretty healthy.

After the retreat concluded around noon, I drove into Monmouth and parked my car in front of Madrona Park.  Then I ran on the Monmouth Rickreall bike path that starts in downtown Monmouth and ends in downtown Rickreall.  It was hard going out because it was very windy.  Coming back was pretty easy.  Then I ran around Western's campus looping around until going back to Madrona Park.  My observations about Monmouth are as follows 1)  Monmouth is DEAD!  It is a sleepy town.  I saw zero runners and about 5-6 bikers.  It was a warm beautiful Sunday.  I can't believe how quiet Western's campus was.  When I was at USC last April it was so incredibly busy all hours of the day--then again that was LA.  This is small town Oregon.  2)  Monmouth is flat.  I don't think I ran up a single hill.  It was a nice break from all the crazy South Salem hills.  3)  I LOVED the Monmouth/Rickreall path.  It goes right by vineyards, wineries, and fields. There was only like two major intersections to cross.  It is right along the 99 but there is enough space that you don't feel the trucks whizzing by.  I think I am going to take the kids on it this summer. I was able to run about 16.2 miles total!

I came home from the retreat and felt fine.  Last night I slept terrible.  It was that restless sleep.  I woke up a few times and fell right back asleep.  It felt like I didn't sleep.  It was hard to get up this morning.  My gut was not normal and I am somewhat congested.  I felt OK as the morning went on and then much better but by 3 pm felt sick again.  Despite congestion, I feel better now.  I'm also still struggling with anxiety and that isn't helping.  I am jumpy and jittery and can't totally put my finger on why.  It has helped to journal and talk to Rob about it.  Running really really helps. I had zero anxiety on the retreat.  I think a big part of it is coming home and trying to piece together my schedule & to do list.  I don't have a lot of extra stuff this week but I do have quite a bit of extra child care.  

I didn't eat great today because I didn't feel good.  When I don't feel good I only crave junk.  If this is the cold everyone else got, it is not going to last super long and it's mild.

2/18 & 2/19: Bike, Swim, and Hungry All the Time

Yesterday was one of the mornings I awoke and was hit hard with anxiety.  I have not had it that bad in quite awhile.  Normally I would have gone to Group Ride no problem, but I just couldn't do it.  Thankfully my husband was understanding and took a long lunch so I could do the stationary bike for 40 minutes at the gym in the afternoon.  I had no child care in the afternoon so it worked perfectly.  I would much rather go to Ride--I get a better workout.  It was better than doing nothing at all.

This morning I felt significantly better.  I woke up before the alarm and made it to swim on time.  We did lots of 100's and 200's today.  I kept having problems with my goggles leaking or being too tight most of the workout.  It was nice to be in the water.  I checked my weight and it really hasn't changed at all.  I am maintaining which is OK with me.  If I lose or gain it almost always 1/4 to 1/2 pound--nothing overly significant.  I am convinced I cannot lose anymore than I am unless I go on a crash diet or get sick which I am not going to do.

I was hungry again all day yesterday.  For the most part I ate pretty healthy.  It's the after school time when I really start craving junk.  I need to get some more protein powder and make some more bars or find more shakes I like.

I have slept all night waking up a few minutes before the alarm goes off.  I wake up feeling pretty rested aside for bad morning anxiety I have had off and for the past week.  Thankfully I didn't have the anxiety this morning.

2/16 and 2/17 Roller skating and sunrise run

I did not exercise yesterday because I ran so long on Sunday.  I took the kids to Riverfront Park in the afternoon. It was 62 out! Kara biked to the pedestrian bridge while Hailey skated.  Derek skated too but he needed LOTS of help from me.  He held on to my arm the whole time.  I was not on skates as that didn't work as well last time.  He is catching on and doing better.  I am thankful we have a sidewalk and parking lot where he can practice.  Kara is almost off training wheels.  She probably will be by the end of the summer if not before.

This morning I got out the door at 6:10 am and ran with Tracy.  We did around 5 miles.  We ran around the Skyline neighborhood.  Some of it I have run before and some of it was new.  It was nice to talk and visit together while we ran.  As we came over the Davis hill the sun was beginning to rise over Mount Hood.  It was amazingly beautiful.  I love Oregon.  I don't think I would have pushed myself on the hills had I not been running with her.  I probably would have stopped because I was feeling out of breath on Skyline.

Today is one of those days I am non-stop hungry.  I had oatmeal for breakfast which is usually filling.  I had a rice cake as a mid morning snack.  For lunch I split some soup with Rob and had a few of his low fat chips.  An hour later I had a whole wheat tortilla with a slice of turkey and cheese.  I'm still hungry! And I'm craving junk.  I'm trying a new soup tonight which I am hoping is not a disaster.

I slept really good last night.  I fell asleep by 10:30 and felt rested when the arm went off.  Yesterday was a very crummy hormonal day.  Except for the three hours I was out with the kids and at the park with them, I would just assume forget how miserable I was.  I hate that!  Today I feel more stable again.  I can recognize it now and prepare for it--I just can't seem to get through it sometimes.

2/14 & 2/15: 15.2 miles!

On Saturday I was able to get out of bed before 8:00 am and run 7 miles at the South Salem Track.  I did a 2 mile warm up, 1 mile with 400 recovery, 2 x 800, 400, 800, all with 400 recovery and a cool down.  The track was very busy when I got there but by the time I was on my last mile everyone was gone.  It was warm with a lot of fog in the air.  I treated myself to Jamba Juice afterwards which was my incentive of getting up early on a Saturday morning.  We had a very busy weekend with going out for Valentines Day, basketball games, Rob's book signing, getting together with the Roth's, and church on Sunday.  I am thankful we have President's Day to recover and the weather has been so warm in the 60's.  We can do a lot outside for the time being.  It will get cold and rainy again before it stays warm for good.

On Sunday I did my long run in the afternoon and I am at 15.2 miles.  I did 9 miles with a detour at home to get more hammer gel and sports drink and then did the rest of the run.  My last couple miles I was going to run off Madrona which goes by Berger Lake.  Someone was telling me have a small lake practically right in our neighborhood.  Well it turns out it is a gated community and I couldn't get through.  Instead I had to run up Hillview which is a miserable steep hill.  I did quite a few hills and I am still struggling on them.  I think I walked 8-9 times for around 30 seconds each.  However my pace was normal.  I feel like I am going so slow and taking forever, but I'm really not.  I would like to be able to run up with the hills without having to stop halfway up.  I also realized I don't like running in the afternoon.  It takes a big chunk of the day.  I would much rather run in the mornings.  The problem is that it still not getting light until 7:00 am so a lot of it is running in the dark.

I am not very sore today despite the long run but I am resting.  Tomorrow I am running with Tracy again.

I ate pretty well all weekend.  We had pizza Saturday night which isn't the healthiest.  But I didn't get a hot dog at the game and instead snacked on carrots and peanut butter.

I have not had any sleep issues lately.  Everyone is healthy.  Derek is coughing a tiny bit at night but his cold was so mild.  We think Rob had mildly too but he hardly noticed it.

2/13: TGIF...just kidding..Fridays are hard

This morning I did NOT get up to go running even though I had every intention in doing so.  It was that feeling I used to get a couple years ago where I don't want to get up and face the day.  Fridays are hard.  I am wiped out by 4:30 pm.  The afternoon school pick-ups are tiring.  I am not trying to complain about my life because I have a great job and today went really well.  I am just a little worn out with Fridays.  I wish my Friday could be my Wednesday.  But I am pressing on.  At least I ate good today.

2/12--Swimming and eating

It was great to swim this morning.  We did a full hour of our normal workout, followed by a pyramid of 250 pull, 150 stroke, 100 swim, 50 kick and then back up again followed by drills, breathing, and cool down.  I tried to focus a bit on speed and do more backstroke as well.

I stepped on the scale this morning and I am the lowest I have been in quite awhile.  Well except for two years ago after I had a nasty stomach bug and I freaked out how much weight I lost.  Of course I gained it all back rather quickly.  

Rob made steel cut oats again and I find this is more filling.  I need a small snack at 10:30 am but I don't feel overly crazy hungry all morning.  I had a homemade whole wheat quesadilla for lunch along with celery with hummus.  No shakes today although my homemade protein bars rock.  I love them.  My guilty pleasure is Diet Mountain Dew.  I go through spurts. Lately I crave it at lunch after going several weeks without it. It's hard to get through the afternoon without a shot of caffeine, but I need to get off it again.  Tonight is going to be an unhealthy eating night as we have a pizza party and then I am meeting some friends for late night apps at Applebees.  I don't think I am going to order much--maybe just a drink.

Last night was not a great night of sleep.  Derek was really congested and not sleeping well.  He had some scary dreams around 12:30 am and woke me up, but he went right back to sleep.  He stayed home from school for the morning only. His appetite is back to normal and he has no fever or anything--just a little congested.  The cat also went crazy during the night again...I honestly think she was freaking about Derek not sleeping well.  The last time Kara was not sleeping well and Hailey slept in the family room and I slept upstairs--she went spastic and crazy.  Rob said she was checking on everyone.  I feel asleep pretty much right away both times so I was able to feel rested when I got up for swimming.

I kind of dread Fridays because the house is full all day and lately we have not been able to utilize the outdoors (although tomorrow is supposed to be nicer). Two Fridays ago the toddlers napped opposite and I was surprised how that tired me out.  I am going to coordinate their naps better tomorrow.  I need to run in the morning so at least I get some "me" time before the chaos begins.

2/11 Ride and Protein Shake Experiments

Today I went to Group Ride and I was so happy I got there.  I almost rolled over and went back to sleep.  It was a good workout.  I am still getting back into the groove of going to this class.  I don't feel totally comfortable and I can't get to recommended RPM...I am always slower and tire out quicker.  But I will keep going.  One of my goals for 2015 was to get more comfortable on the bike and I want to stick with it.

I am still experimenting with protein shakes.  So far I think I like chocolate, peanut butter, banana, and milk.  A half serving is a reasonable amount of calories. I tried another Mounds smoothie on Friday and it was absolutely disgusting.  I will not have them as meal replacement which is why I won't buy them from a MLM company, but they are great for after workout or mid morning snacks...especially on my long run days.  According to MFP, I am lowest on protein.  We aren't vegetarian but we don't eat a lot of meat compared to the average American and we also don't eat many beans. I love peanut butter and I could eat it all day long, but it has a high sugar content...at least the kind we buy.  I did make my own protein bars this afternoon and I will have to see if they taste any good.  I love my sweet potato breakfast burritos...although they aren't as filling as a bowl of oatmeal or vegan salad.

Sleepwise I am doing great.  I have had no issues the past couple of months.

Sickness is going around the school again (which is probably always the case...just been more paranoid about it since all the sickness we've dealt with in the fall and Hailey's flu last month).  Derek might have a minor cold and I think it might be just that...hopefully.  I've been exposed to a lot of junk lately among the child care kids too.  Cold/flu season is not over yet.  We'll see if thieves oil protects us or does nothing whatsoever.  I haven't had anything since Christmas.  

2/7 - 2/10 Running solo or with others

When I did a semester abroad to Indonesia sixteen years ago, we had to put together plans for a community development project.  At the time I did not fully understand what we were supposed to do...which is a bit ironic because it is the kind of thing I am passionate about now.  We had to be out in the community (obviously), talking to people in a language we could hardly speak, and figuring out what the needs were for that given village.  To some people this sounds daunting and scary--for me that wasn't the scary part at all.  The part that intimidated me was the fact us females could not go anywhere outside of the premises of our gated conference grounds without another person with us (female or male).  The "not being safe" part did not scare me...I was a little naive...but I honestly never felt in danger.  The asking someone to go with me to help with the research was intimidating.  I worried about inconveniencing my teammates or the staff.  Everyone had their own schedule and things they wanted to get done during our limited free time. I hated being dependent on other people and wished I could have done it myself.

I was only twenty-two and not very independent yet and not near as confident.  I am a little more intentional now and in the right moment willing to put myself out there.  But I am still very much a people pleaser.  When it has come to running over the years, I again just want to do it myself and not burden people.  I don't want to inconvenience anyone.  I am afraid to put myself out there and run with other people except of course during a race.  Lately for the past few years I have been craving running with others.  I honestly get jealous when I hear about people training for things together.

I have tried.  It is not like I put forth zero effort.  I ran with Trena a couple times when she still lived here. Then she got injured and then she moved away.  I mentioned the idea of running together to two or three people over the years but for whatever reason it never happened.  I tried going to the triathlon club's track workouts on Monday mornings.  They all run 6 minute miles.  Honestly it was discouraging and it felt like running alone anyway--I kind of wanted my ipod because I could not be a part of the conversations because I could not keep up with the group.  I'm not an elite runner like that and I don't think I want to be.

Around this time two years ago I met some triathletes at the pool for Wednesday morning swimming.  I met Angie, an elite triathlete who taught me how to follow a swim workout.  I ended up sharing a lane with her junior high son and a guy with an injured knee...and they still kicked my butt.  I could not keep up with them and they were constantly passing me.  A few lanes over were Tracy, Erica, and Kristin doing their own workout.  The following week I showed up and not a sole was at the pool except for Tracy and Erica who told me I could swim with them and follow their workout.  They answered questions...even simple ones I was afraid to ask because they were so "beginner swimming."  Within a year or so I became "a regular."  They text me to tell me if they are swimming or not in the mornings.  I know them a little bit better beyond the pool.

They and a few other of their friends do almost their workouts together whether it be swimming, biking, running, weight lifting.  They go to races together and trained for an Ironman together.  They are a community of triathletes.  I have been such a lone athlete all these years that I have never been a part of anything like this. I have gotten used to it.  I know there is some benefit in training alone.  I crave the solitude.  I have kids climbing me all day that I need the alone time too. I know I need the community too.  This past summer I swam in the Silverton Reservoir with a guy named Len from the triathlon club.  It really helped me get over my fear of open water--like I was no longer afraid anymore and my confidence grew.  I have not swam with him since, but I am so grateful for that swim.

This morning was the first time I ran with Tracy (and I learned a couple weeks ago she lives literally one mile from my house and I ran past her street almost every time I run).  It felt so good to run with someone.  It was motivating and I probably would not have tackled the hills as well I did had I not been alone.  I don't know if I can continue to run with them.  Some of them have more free time than I do and don't have children...or else their children are grown.  Some aren't married and some have more freedom in times they can get out of the house.  But I hope this can continue to be a community I can be a part of it as my schedule allows.

I have also been craving friends outside my faith community (church, moms group etc.)  I have no idea if any of these people are Christians and I don't know their story.  I know they know I am and a pastor's wife to boot.  But I am grateful to be able to be "me" i.e. not the pastor's wife.  It took two years before I even did anything with them outside of swimming (I went out with them on a Friday night a few weekends ago).  It really just shows how long friendships take to develop if they grow at all.

For some reason this was therapeutic for me to write about and was heavy on my mind.

In a nutshell I ran 5 miles on Friday, ran the track on Sunday three miles (and took Derek & Kara and we got soaked in the rain), rested on Monday (big windstorm and nasty rain) and ran 4 miles with Tracy today.  I have been eating great!!  Rob made cauliflower soup last night with leeks and all 3 kids and I loved it!  Hailey even took leftovers in her lunch.  MFP is working this time around and I'm no longer craving junk constantly like I was 3 weeks ago. My sleep has been good too.

2/5--Swimming and new recipes

This morning I went swimming with Tracy.  Erica is sick.  We did our regular warm-up, followed a pyramid, then speed swims, breathing, and cool down.  I did about 3/4 of what she did.  She can swim a 50 in a little less than a minute while it took me one minute and five seconds almost consistently.  The pool was pretty quiet this morning.  I also did the yoga app on my ipad yesterday afternoon.  I honestly don't know if it making any kind of difference in my leg muscles.  But I was having a crummy late afternoon and I felt more at peace after doing yoga.

I made some sweet potato breakfast burritos to freeze.  I ate one for lunch to see if I really like it.  I do and they are pretty healthy.  I also starting drinking grapefruit juice in the morning because I am not getting enough Vitamin C.  I am thinking about trying to eat an actual grapefruit instead.  My dad loves grapefruit--I remember him eating it for breakfast fairly often when I was a kid.  Our tastes are so similar that I think I would like them too.  For breakfast Rob made eggs.  The kids are getting really sick of cold cereal and toast.  We used to do hot breakfast on the weekend, but we haven't since Christmas Break mostly due to basketball games.  I had some eggs on a piece of Super Food bread from Great Harvest (which is also healthy but so expensive--I got some for free from a friend).  For supper I am trying a pork chop recipe from the Food Network so we'll see if it's any good.

I slept amazing last night.  I slept right to the alarm.  My sleep has been so great the last couple of nights.

2/4: Coconut smoothie and back to Group Ride

This morning I woke up early and went to Group Ride.  I have not been since late fall.  I think if I keep going I will get more into it.  Charles was subbing for Sarah which was kind of funny because he's one of my clients for child care.  He really does a great job and explains good form quite well.

I tried a protein shake for breakfast.  I feel like I need something to chew. It doesn't feel like eating breakfast, but I think I could do it a little more often especially on busier mornings.  I mixed the chocolate protein mix with vanilla yogurt and added some coconut oil.  It tasted like a Mounds bar which are my favorite.  The vanilla yogurt it low fat but I think I might find something healthier.  I know a lot of people use almond milk but I am not sure I want to go that route.  For lunch the kids got Mc Donalds and I settled for a salad which is not as many calories as I thought.

I have no idea what they are serving at church tonight but I am hoping it's not too fattening.  I am the hungriest between 9 AM and Noon.  It seems to taper off as the day goes on. Last night I ate very little after supper--just a mini muffin--and I was fine.  I didn't crave really anything.

I had another really good night of sleep.  I don't know how much the lavender oil plays a role in that, but it does to seem to help with at least relaxing to fall asleep.  Hailey seems to be sleeping better too.

1/30 - 2/3: 13 miles and I miss Spartan

So here is a recap of the last few days.  On Saturday I was successful of getting out of bed at 6:30 am and running 13 miles!  I stunk it on the hills again.  I don't think I could run successfully up a hill without stopping.  It was not as much my thighs but fatigue...no willpower.  It might because I worked out approximately 10 days in a row with no break.  Also it was so much colder than I thought it would be.  I looked at the Weather Channel app before I went to bed and it said it would be around the mid 30's which I dressed for.  My hands were absolutely freezing and it made my whole body uncomfortable.  I put them in my sleeves but they were still cold--it reminded me of climbing South Sister with freezing hands.  The temperature at Kuebler and Commercial said 27 degrees--so much for mid 30's.  It took a good hour and a half before I wasn't cold anymore.  Even after coming home my body temperature was all out of whack for awhile.  I really enjoy running in the Sunnyslope and Salem Heights neighborhoods.  The hills stink, but I needed a change. I was sick of all the same routes.

I am wondering if it would make any difference to do hill workouts once in awhile with track runs.  I know the triathlon club does them.  The track itself is at the bottom of hill and they run all the way to the top and back several times.  It sounds miserable to me.  I am willing to try it only if it's early morning and not many people are around.

Sunday was a well deserved rest day.

Yesterday I ran in the evening.  It is finally a light after 5 pm but I was in the dark by the time I finished.  I did 5 miles and my run was world's different from last week.  I was going fast--like 8-9 minute miles.  I also cruised up the hills without having to slow down.  I think the rest day made a huge difference.

I could have run today but I think Tuesday is going to be my official rest day.  It works out well that way.  I felt like I still need the rest.  It is a kick back week in terms of marathon training and technically I am supposed to take an extra day off.  The weather is rainy today anyway.

I really miss Spartan.  I wish it was not so expensive.  I would love another month of it.

I read an article on Hal Higdon's Facebook page about how training for a marathon is not a good weight loss plan. He says to lose weight and get healthy and then train for a marathon which makes a lot of sense. Some people even gain weight while training.  The people who commented about gaining weight also said they overate or they ate a lot of junk.  Which is exactly where I was headed.  My Fitness Pal is helping me not to overeat and eat the right foods.  I notice a difference that I feel a little more balanced during the day.  My anxiety and PMS has not been non-existent but it has been mild.  I am not going to be a slave to MFP--if I go over a few calories I am not going to sweat it.  On the days of my long runs I am always way under even though I do try to eat more on those days and the day before.  Hal Higdon recommends not eating as much at night and having lighter suppers.  Which is how we eat.  Our suppers are the right portion.  We have told the kids you don't need to eat until you are "stuff your face full."  The rest of the world doesn't eat like that anyway.  They kind of graze and eat throughout the day anyway which I also do on my busy days.

I slept amazing last night.  I slept right to the alarm.  I put a little lavender oil in my pillow and I think it helped me fall asleep in a more relaxed state.