Today is one those "off" days on Planet Daycare when no one wants to nap when they are supposed to and everyone is not acting their normal selves. There is no rhyme or reason to the schedule. I am grateful my moods are not off today and hormonal levels normal so I can handle it. April is a hard month with zero time off.
I have done pretty good with keeping up with exercising despite everything. I am pretty behind on logging it here. The week of April 10th--I can't remember but I think I went to Ride on that Monday, Power on Tuesday, swim on Wednesday, off on Thursday, ran Friday late afternoon, and did an awesome 22 mile ride along River Road and back on Saturday, and then a short 3 1/2 mile run Sunday evening. Last week was different as I did only one early morning, but I managed to get five workouts in. On Monday last week I had planned to go to Ride but was super tired from the weekend so I took the day off from exercise. I ran Tuesday late afternoon instead of going to Power. I did get to swim on Wednesday. I wanted to go to Power on Thursday but skipped out. Wednesday was a very long and somewhat stressful day. On Friday afternoon I rode the indoor bike. My bike is currently in the bike shop getting a tune up and some other work done. Saturday morning I went to Group Ride. On Sunday I ran a little over five miles and it was terrible. I felt fatigued all over and I could not breathe. I was overdressed and the humidity was high in the air--my body is not used to it. I pushed myself to get five miles in and it was tough. I redeemed myself with a better run Monday morning with Tracy. I got 4 miles in. On Tuesday I went to Power with her. Yesterday we swam. Today was a day off.
I am figuring on doing Deschutes Dash in July though I have not signed up yet. I want to bike this weekend but he's not done with my bike yet. So it might be indoor cycling again.
I have taken better care of myself. I started counting calories again this week and laying off the junk. I made myself a chart to try and do the following each day 1) very short yoga session with foam rolling and stretching--15 or so minutes 2) work on Bible Study 3) daily cleaning jobs based on a schedule I made years ago and don't always stick to 4) read for fun 5) play guitar This on top of a weekly to do list which has tasks based on my job/church/Banner/whatever else. I am not being perfectionist about it. On Monday I only hit one of the five, but yesterday I made four. Guitar is somewhat on hold right now, but my intention is to pick it back up again soon. I have too much going on right now. All in all I feel like I am taking better care of me. I think sometimes we think taking care of ourselves is spa days, buying things, and getting away from our kids. That has its place and we do need that. I am referring to the day to day things--eating good, spending time doing hobbies, keeping the house in a state where it does create anxiety. Stretching and yoga is good to maintain my stress level and also help with my IT band issues. My right ankle and now right knee hurt from time to time and it might all be related to the IT band.
I have found one of my biggest issues is simply getting started. I stall, do something unrelated, or give myself permission NOT to do something I should be doing. This happens when I sit down to work on my Bible Study, write an article, even read a book, go running with the kids. I think it's just a fear that it won't go well, it will not be enjoyable, I won't be able to focus, or that I just don't want to put forth the effort. Once I start going I get into it and I feel great. I have been making myself really aware of this and it helps tackle it. I had this with running and later swimming and still biking for many many years and I don't anymore with running and not much with swimming. I don't fear running except the super long runs with marathon training...but even so I never skip them. It helps tremendously just being aware of this. I can live my life a little more intentional. I see this in some of my kids too--their anxiety about starting something. It is easier to gravitate towards something that is easier. I want them to conquer the challenges even if it means they fail. I remember talking to my teacher my Indonesia back in February and I told him one thing I learned in Indonesia that it is OK to fail if you tried and gave it your best effort. Whenever you start something for the first time, it is going to be rough. My first run was painful. My first time swimming Wednesday mornings was embarrassing. My first open water swim was even more embarrassing. My first time biking in clips on the road was scary. My first article I wrote for the Banner was bad...thankfully I had a good proof reader that helped me turn it into a good article. My first year of child care was exhausting and I could barely handle two kids. I am giving myself grace and acceptance yet challenging myself at the same time.
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